CONSTRUCTION

Pitchforked
• Noise – The primary activities of a law student during class, as everyone knows, are thinking deep thoughts and napping while others try to explain their own deep thoughts. Nothing disrupts those like power drills and intermittent loud banging.
• Food – So, let’s review our options here: a cold wrap/burrito that may be rendered marginally edible with the aid of a microwave, a quesadilla of indeterminate age, and . . . hmm, something else that’s apparently sold out. Fuqua, anyone?
• Space restrictions – There’s nothing left to say about this that hasn’t already been said ad nauseum. In fact, you (yes, you) have already vocalized at least one complaint along these lines this week, and it’s Tuesday. That doesn’t make it less annoying.

Haloed
• The Annex – An honorary halo for unwarranted abuse. The annex isn’t exactly gorgeous, and you do have to brave the elements to get to it, but it’s not that bad. You don’t have a positive impression of the annex, but that’s because you go there to read, outline, and write briefs. It fulfills its purpose of giving you a place to do all that stuff you hate, and it’s not the annex’s fault if you hate it.
• Professorial Expressions of Irritation – Top honors in this category go to Mr. Jedediah Purdy for calling the building manager on several occasions to stop the noise disrupting his concentration on weighty matters of property law. Once he even went personally to tell the crew to keep it down. He didn’t get results, of course, but I still enjoy imagining him walking in among the hard hats, in his Gucci jacket and designer jeans, and telling them to cut it out.

LAW STUDENTS:

Pitchforked
• Gunners – You know who you are. When you have a question, try taking a deep breath, and asking yourself first, whether there is more than one answer that makes sense, and second, whether anyone else in the room is likely to care what the answer is. If you answered “no” one or more times, you should probably save it for after class. The rest of us would like to talk about things that matter. Thanks.
• People Who Ignore Everyone Outside Their Immediate Friend Circles – Seriously, what is this? Middle school? Most of us hated middle school, and I’m pretty sure we all graduated a while ago and don’t want to go back. If you liked middle school, I’m sorry for you, but the proper solution probably involves psychiatric help.

Haloed
• Nice People – Law school stress makes it easy to forget about the presence of people who express actual caring for the wellbeing of others. There’s a certain tendency to focus on the negatives about our classmates in general, and those who resist the temptation are rare gems worthy of appreciation.
• Smart People – This is a shout-out to everyone here. We all came here in part to be intellectually challenged by our peers. Whatever our collective and individual foibles and inconsistencies, we’re all really smart. The coolness of that hasn’t worn off yet.
• Hot People – There are a fair number of law school folks of both genders who are especially easy on the eyes. Some of them clearly work quite hard at it; to others it appears to come naturally. The rest of us appreciate your presence. We apologize if you notice us appreciating you. It’s a compliment.

SOCIAL EVENTS:

Pitchforked
• The Halloween Party – Worst. Busing. Ever.
• Events Where Law Students Actually Talk to People Who Aren’t Law Students – These events could most easily improve by, well, actually happening. It’s possible to go a little crazy from seeing nobody except your classmates. Left to ourselves, the temptation to talk in law jargon is too strong. It can’t be healthy to do that all the time.

Haloed
• Bar Review – Thursday night becomes an oasis of sanity thanks to this beloved tradition. The above complaint notwithstanding, sometimes it’s a blast to rant about contracts and torts in nonsense words (Bargained-for reliance! Res ipsa loquitur!) over a few beers.
• Duke Law Idol – Thigh-high gold-sequined boots, “Baby Got Back,” and the dance moves of a certain professor were all prominently featured in the evening’s entertainment. What more could you ask?
• Barrister’s Ball – It was a little crowded, sure, but that’s just evidence that we don’t have enough opportunities to wear tuxedoes around here. We’re a classy bunch, and we rarely show it off quite so well as we did at the beginning of the Ball. Eventually, of course, the free drinks worked their magic. But it was still the best-dressed drunken throng I’ve ever seen.